Sath thesmilingstar
02-24 05:09 PM
Yes.. u can apply for FAFSA.. U do qualify. U can either PM me or Call them directly. They are very helpful.
Good Luck..
RV..
"AP is Advance Parole" to enter US.
yes i did call them and they were asking me for a social security number which i donot have so how do i deal with this.
Good Luck..
RV..
"AP is Advance Parole" to enter US.
yes i did call them and they were asking me for a social security number which i donot have so how do i deal with this.
amar123
07-12 04:26 PM
I believe the only reason EB visa numbers have gone unused in recent years is due to the the inability of FBI in completing namecheck/background check in a timely FIFO fashion. As a result USCIS is unable to approve pending I485s even when the visa numbers are available. This also keeps the VISA BULLETIN doors closed for new I485s.
This (besides labor backlog) spoils the FIFO for GCs.
Fixing FBI security check process will end such visa bulletin fiasco. I believe in recent year or two USCIS has processed various applications (including I485) in a very timely fashion (ofcourse there are exceptions). But many I485s get stuck in the security check bottleneck. Since, visa number is assigned at the approval time the whole FIFO goes to hell.
DOS should be issuing VISA BULLETIN based on pending approvable I485 (meaning security check complete) and fiscal year visa availability. If former is smaller than latter then bulletin dates should move forward based on approved I140s which have not applied for AOS. This is not rocket science but simple math which is lost on DOS, USCIS & FBI.
However, fixing FBI security checks (timely completion) will restore FIFO once labor backlog is gone.
FBI delays is the prime reason for this fiasco.
BTW my AOS is pending due to indefinite background check delay.
Every guy thinks that his/her problem is always the biggest bottleneck
This (besides labor backlog) spoils the FIFO for GCs.
Fixing FBI security check process will end such visa bulletin fiasco. I believe in recent year or two USCIS has processed various applications (including I485) in a very timely fashion (ofcourse there are exceptions). But many I485s get stuck in the security check bottleneck. Since, visa number is assigned at the approval time the whole FIFO goes to hell.
DOS should be issuing VISA BULLETIN based on pending approvable I485 (meaning security check complete) and fiscal year visa availability. If former is smaller than latter then bulletin dates should move forward based on approved I140s which have not applied for AOS. This is not rocket science but simple math which is lost on DOS, USCIS & FBI.
However, fixing FBI security checks (timely completion) will restore FIFO once labor backlog is gone.
FBI delays is the prime reason for this fiasco.
BTW my AOS is pending due to indefinite background check delay.
Every guy thinks that his/her problem is always the biggest bottleneck
corleone
03-19 11:18 AM
How will an I-140 gets cancelled just because he left the company. GC is for future employment, that should have nothing to do with the current employment. Same with Place of work issue, place of issue on H1 has nothing to do with I-140
As amit has suggested approaching Senators will do wonders (atleast for some)
GC is for future employment but I-140 is not GC. I-485 is Adjustment of status to Permanent resident (GC).
If you leave the company prior I-140 approval. I-140, I-485, EAD & AP are canceled.
If your I-140 is approved and I-485 is pending for more than 180 days, then and only then, you can switch company using AC21 while still keeping your I-485 pending.
Mind you, I-140 is not your application, it is employers!
As amit has suggested approaching Senators will do wonders (atleast for some)
GC is for future employment but I-140 is not GC. I-485 is Adjustment of status to Permanent resident (GC).
If you leave the company prior I-140 approval. I-140, I-485, EAD & AP are canceled.
If your I-140 is approved and I-485 is pending for more than 180 days, then and only then, you can switch company using AC21 while still keeping your I-485 pending.
Mind you, I-140 is not your application, it is employers!
eb3_nepa
08-16 04:36 AM
Hi Guys,
I am on H1B and my wife is working using her EAD. Like most people on here we applied in the July 2007 rush.
Now her licence in PA was expiring and we went to renew it and provided ALL necessary documents such as Passport, I-94, current and future EADs. However at the very end after about half an hour of providing documents, the DMV guy said that the system needed "more info" and that he would have to fax everything to Harrisburg who would then contact the INS for the missing info and we would get some "letter" from the DMV.
Has anyone faced a similar issue in PA before? If so how soon after did they receive this letter? Is there anything I can do to expedite the process such as contacting my local Sentator/Congressman's office? We have a small baby and my wife needs to drive to go to work.
Thanks.
I am on H1B and my wife is working using her EAD. Like most people on here we applied in the July 2007 rush.
Now her licence in PA was expiring and we went to renew it and provided ALL necessary documents such as Passport, I-94, current and future EADs. However at the very end after about half an hour of providing documents, the DMV guy said that the system needed "more info" and that he would have to fax everything to Harrisburg who would then contact the INS for the missing info and we would get some "letter" from the DMV.
Has anyone faced a similar issue in PA before? If so how soon after did they receive this letter? Is there anything I can do to expedite the process such as contacting my local Sentator/Congressman's office? We have a small baby and my wife needs to drive to go to work.
Thanks.
more...
deardar
09-17 01:53 PM
Dear folks,
I tried to help your mission. I offered my talent, time, and my experience of delivering messages.
Written to the forum and called in several times, was promised to get a call back.
And was not contacted, nor called.
And here is my message for you:
You do not care about immigration reform - you care about your own green cards. You care ONLY about daisy consultants, such as yourselves, and you are not ready to address issues at large.
You do not speak on behalf of me, nor you speak on behalf of the mainstream any employment based immigrant.
Best of luck.
Sir,
Was there any specific information that you needed ?
I tried to help your mission. I offered my talent, time, and my experience of delivering messages.
Written to the forum and called in several times, was promised to get a call back.
And was not contacted, nor called.
And here is my message for you:
You do not care about immigration reform - you care about your own green cards. You care ONLY about daisy consultants, such as yourselves, and you are not ready to address issues at large.
You do not speak on behalf of me, nor you speak on behalf of the mainstream any employment based immigrant.
Best of luck.
Sir,
Was there any specific information that you needed ?
amsgc
04-04 02:29 PM
BTW, what does OP stand for?
OP: Original Poster
OP: Original Poster
more...
sledge_hammer
02-08 05:25 PM
Love to take the poll, but it is excluding all but a section of members - you take it for granted that this is an Indian only forum and organization
My bad! I just copy-pasted from a similar named thread and renamed EB3 to EB2 :o
My bad! I just copy-pasted from a similar named thread and renamed EB3 to EB2 :o
sk2006
07-14 10:47 PM
Hi,
Recently I transfered my H1 B from X company to Y company & now I am going for my visa renewal. My previous employer is not providing me the experience letter. Though I am having all my paystubs, appointment letter etc. I think I need the experience letter also...So what should I do now. Please suggest me.
Thanks,
Sangeetha K
Dear Sangeetha,
For H1B you may not need exp letter.
However for I140, you will and you can get experience letter from Ex-Colleagues or Ex-Manager. It worked for me.
Recently I transfered my H1 B from X company to Y company & now I am going for my visa renewal. My previous employer is not providing me the experience letter. Though I am having all my paystubs, appointment letter etc. I think I need the experience letter also...So what should I do now. Please suggest me.
Thanks,
Sangeetha K
Dear Sangeetha,
For H1B you may not need exp letter.
However for I140, you will and you can get experience letter from Ex-Colleagues or Ex-Manager. It worked for me.
more...
Gravitation
10-23 10:30 AM
One common misconception is that there's a "quota" for each country. There's none.
The number 2600 is actually the upper limit. It means that no one country should get more visa numbers than 2600.
The total number of EB3 visa numbers for the whole world is 40,000. There's no entitlement here. There's no guarantee of all visa numbers being issued. There's no minimum number of visas that a specific country is sure to get...
If there's a demand for more than 2600 for a specific country, it's said to be oversubscribed. If the total demand from all countries remains below 40,000, the remaining visa numbers may overflow to the oversubscribed countries.
Once again, it's perfectly within the law to issue less than 40,000 visa numbers. It's a limit, not a quota.
The number 2600 is actually the upper limit. It means that no one country should get more visa numbers than 2600.
The total number of EB3 visa numbers for the whole world is 40,000. There's no entitlement here. There's no guarantee of all visa numbers being issued. There's no minimum number of visas that a specific country is sure to get...
If there's a demand for more than 2600 for a specific country, it's said to be oversubscribed. If the total demand from all countries remains below 40,000, the remaining visa numbers may overflow to the oversubscribed countries.
Once again, it's perfectly within the law to issue less than 40,000 visa numbers. It's a limit, not a quota.
micofrost
07-16 05:59 PM
AILA/AILF
Another mess in creation or what. Whatever AILA/AILF is publishing is in stark contrast to IV and others.
What the hell is happening. I would love to believe IV but would hate to ignore AILA. IS AILA screwing up because they need some financial reimbursement too. From their press release, looks like we have a long ride ahead.
Another mess in creation or what. Whatever AILA/AILF is publishing is in stark contrast to IV and others.
What the hell is happening. I would love to believe IV but would hate to ignore AILA. IS AILA screwing up because they need some financial reimbursement too. From their press release, looks like we have a long ride ahead.
more...
ilikekilo
03-03 09:30 AM
Hello forum gurus
I am planning on moving from Company A to Company B. I have an approved I-140 from Company A which was approved in Sept 2007 and also applied for 485 on July 2nd 2007. It has been almost 1.5 yrs since I applied for 485 and I-140 approval.
Planning to move from Company A to Company B. Company A will not revoke my I-140 that is for sure. I am moving to a good company with 1000+ workforce and in an upcoming industry. It is not a consulting firm. It is a product based company. My wife is currently on EAD and is relying on it to work.
What are the odds that my AC21 may be wrongfully denied. I am having a hard time sleeping while thinking about this. I am on my H1. Can she still use her EAD while we file a petition for Motion to Reopen in the event that the 485 is wrongfully denied or does she have to change to H4 immediatly.
Can some one share your thoughts.
thanks in advance
I hear you...however the probability of success predicting the odds with USCIS are zero to none.. be +ve and move on.. Listen, iam not being philosophical here but I did move on from a so called "secure" and great company using AC21....to a smaller one....
was I concerned when I was planning to move : yes
do i loose sleep over this? no
did i file for ac 21? yes
Am I really worried : heck no
Am i ready for anything that comes my way from USCIS: heck yes and I will deal with it..easy to say..yes..but doesnt mean it will stop my life..
ps: btw Iam not single and yes I do have a family with a kid and ofcourse commitments like most poeple... so relax ..take it easy..
reg your question i am sure somone in teh forum is more knowledgeable than Iam..
I am planning on moving from Company A to Company B. I have an approved I-140 from Company A which was approved in Sept 2007 and also applied for 485 on July 2nd 2007. It has been almost 1.5 yrs since I applied for 485 and I-140 approval.
Planning to move from Company A to Company B. Company A will not revoke my I-140 that is for sure. I am moving to a good company with 1000+ workforce and in an upcoming industry. It is not a consulting firm. It is a product based company. My wife is currently on EAD and is relying on it to work.
What are the odds that my AC21 may be wrongfully denied. I am having a hard time sleeping while thinking about this. I am on my H1. Can she still use her EAD while we file a petition for Motion to Reopen in the event that the 485 is wrongfully denied or does she have to change to H4 immediatly.
Can some one share your thoughts.
thanks in advance
I hear you...however the probability of success predicting the odds with USCIS are zero to none.. be +ve and move on.. Listen, iam not being philosophical here but I did move on from a so called "secure" and great company using AC21....to a smaller one....
was I concerned when I was planning to move : yes
do i loose sleep over this? no
did i file for ac 21? yes
Am I really worried : heck no
Am i ready for anything that comes my way from USCIS: heck yes and I will deal with it..easy to say..yes..but doesnt mean it will stop my life..
ps: btw Iam not single and yes I do have a family with a kid and ofcourse commitments like most poeple... so relax ..take it easy..
reg your question i am sure somone in teh forum is more knowledgeable than Iam..
BimmerFAn
06-15 05:42 PM
Hey, I would like to help you but I know next to nothing about J-1 Physician waivers. It is a completely different system. My understanding that the best way to get a waiver is to go through the Conrad 30 program if your wife works in a hospital in an underserved area. I would encourage you look through this forum for individuals who would know more about the process. Likewise, I would also suggest that you consult with an attorney. I used one of the best attorney firms in the world and it was relatively inexpensive. Attorneys really do wonders in these cases bacause they understand this process inside and out and know exactly what the Department of State is looking for.
Best of luck!
Best of luck!
more...
jbr
02-27 06:55 PM
Not sure if the conference call mentioned in the previous post has already been held. I wouldn't mind joining in future calls. Thanks.
indyanguy
01-13 07:39 PM
Do they send you a copy of the original?
Hi All,
Thanks for your patience. I was busy yesterday and I would like to provide you all proper information what I sent to FOIA. Here is the information I got from my folders.
1) You need to fill the form G-639 to get the I-140 documents.
2) Provide as much Information as possible about your case. Some of you doesn't have the Receipt Number, they may also fill the form G-639 and provide any other information you have. (Ex: Provide with thorough description of your case in a separate paper.)
3) After filling the form, Notarise it (Your bank will do it)
4) Attach all the documents with this form and send it to:
USCIS National Record Center
FOIA Division
PO Box: 648010
Lee Summit, MO 64064 - 5570
5) There is no fee to submit this form. You will receive a receipt# within a week how they will process your request.
6) There is no way your Employer/Lawyer know about it. Its in between you and FOIA Division.
I feel myself proud to provide all these details to you since I know how difficult to stay with a blody sucking parasite Employer. I spent lot of sleepless nights and I decided to fight with bad/rogue Employers.
Please keep in touch if you have any other details.
Bhanu
Hi All,
Thanks for your patience. I was busy yesterday and I would like to provide you all proper information what I sent to FOIA. Here is the information I got from my folders.
1) You need to fill the form G-639 to get the I-140 documents.
2) Provide as much Information as possible about your case. Some of you doesn't have the Receipt Number, they may also fill the form G-639 and provide any other information you have. (Ex: Provide with thorough description of your case in a separate paper.)
3) After filling the form, Notarise it (Your bank will do it)
4) Attach all the documents with this form and send it to:
USCIS National Record Center
FOIA Division
PO Box: 648010
Lee Summit, MO 64064 - 5570
5) There is no fee to submit this form. You will receive a receipt# within a week how they will process your request.
6) There is no way your Employer/Lawyer know about it. Its in between you and FOIA Division.
I feel myself proud to provide all these details to you since I know how difficult to stay with a blody sucking parasite Employer. I spent lot of sleepless nights and I decided to fight with bad/rogue Employers.
Please keep in touch if you have any other details.
Bhanu
more...
karthiknv143
06-01 05:13 PM
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
deardar
09-17 01:53 PM
Dear folks,
I tried to help your mission. I offered my talent, time, and my experience of delivering messages.
Written to the forum and called in several times, was promised to get a call back.
And was not contacted, nor called.
And here is my message for you:
You do not care about immigration reform - you care about your own green cards. You care ONLY about daisy consultants, such as yourselves, and you are not ready to address issues at large.
You do not speak on behalf of me, nor you speak on behalf of the mainstream any employment based immigrant.
Best of luck.
Sir,
Was there any specific information that you needed ?
I tried to help your mission. I offered my talent, time, and my experience of delivering messages.
Written to the forum and called in several times, was promised to get a call back.
And was not contacted, nor called.
And here is my message for you:
You do not care about immigration reform - you care about your own green cards. You care ONLY about daisy consultants, such as yourselves, and you are not ready to address issues at large.
You do not speak on behalf of me, nor you speak on behalf of the mainstream any employment based immigrant.
Best of luck.
Sir,
Was there any specific information that you needed ?
more...
vsc
01-31 06:31 PM
hi beuhler....if i understand your reply correctly, you meant that as long as there is proof that your marraige date(marraige certificate) is prior to gc approval notice...there is 6 months to file for the i485 for the wife even though she may be in india at the time of marraige?
chapper
11-08 01:57 PM
Yes - I agree with andy garcia
Maverick_2008
02-23 09:10 PM
- My 485 is filed more than 6 months ago
- My is 140 not approved yet
- I get laid off
- My employer doesn't revoke my 140
- I'm already in the 8th year of my H
So, I can go find another employer since I have my EAD and my 485 is filed for more than 180 days. Now, if my 140 is approved, no problem. If, however, my 140 gets an RFE or if my 140 is not too strong, I can find out alternatives including (but not limited to :-)) finding a decent job in my home country while I still have a job here in the US.
Is it logical or should I go take a nap? :p
Maverick_2008
Ummm, how exactly is delayed I 140 good if they are about to be laid off? To be able to use AC21 these guys need need their I 140 approved and have worked for the employer 6 months after receipt date.
I don't see the logic in your statement.
- My is 140 not approved yet
- I get laid off
- My employer doesn't revoke my 140
- I'm already in the 8th year of my H
So, I can go find another employer since I have my EAD and my 485 is filed for more than 180 days. Now, if my 140 is approved, no problem. If, however, my 140 gets an RFE or if my 140 is not too strong, I can find out alternatives including (but not limited to :-)) finding a decent job in my home country while I still have a job here in the US.
Is it logical or should I go take a nap? :p
Maverick_2008
Ummm, how exactly is delayed I 140 good if they are about to be laid off? To be able to use AC21 these guys need need their I 140 approved and have worked for the employer 6 months after receipt date.
I don't see the logic in your statement.
Vet04
12-08 12:47 PM
" kumar1" - What has salary to do with questions or coming to forum? Sorry,I didn't get your point here. I have seen people post all sorts of questions and problems in this forum.
Thank you very much for the time to write your views though ,specially the cons, I would definitely like to know the cons too.
thanx sri, lord and smisachu for the answers.
Thank you very much for the time to write your views though ,specially the cons, I would definitely like to know the cons too.
thanx sri, lord and smisachu for the answers.
yganreddy
08-06 10:58 PM
I read this in other forum and thought of sharing it
----------
When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.
Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man!
That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; I had lost my heart to a lovely girl called Dew. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!
With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, 30% shares of my company and the car. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Dew so dearly.
Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.
The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Dew. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.
In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a months time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.
This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.. She requested that everyday for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy.
Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.
I told Dew about my wife s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully. My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset..
I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.
On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest.. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.
On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Dew about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.
She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily. Suddenly it hit me; she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart.
Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head. Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mum out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.
But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I drove to office... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind... I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I do not want the divorce anymore.
She looked at me, astonished. Then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other any more.. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death does us apart.
Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote:
'I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart'
The small details of our lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, the property, the bank balance that matters. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!
If you don't share this, nothing will happen to you, but if you do, you just might save a marriage.
Relationships are made not to exploit, not to be broken.
We teach some by what we say
We teach some more by what we do
But we teach most by what we are
----------------
You don't get to choose how you are going to die, or when, but, you can decide how you are going to live, here and now.hi,
I came to US 5 years back in H4. My husband processed GC and 140 is cleared and 485 pending. I got my EAD and now working. My husband and I have problems and he is threatening to ruin my life.
Can I know a few things
1. Can he take me out of the GC ?
2. Can he revoke my EAD ?
3. Can my employee extend my EAD which is expiring in 2010 and continue my GC.
please help...
----------
When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.
Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man!
That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; I had lost my heart to a lovely girl called Dew. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!
With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, 30% shares of my company and the car. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Dew so dearly.
Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.
The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Dew. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.
In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a months time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.
This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.. She requested that everyday for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy.
Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.
I told Dew about my wife s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully. My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset..
I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.
On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest.. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.
On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Dew about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.
She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily. Suddenly it hit me; she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart.
Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head. Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mum out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.
But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I drove to office... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind... I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I do not want the divorce anymore.
She looked at me, astonished. Then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other any more.. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death does us apart.
Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote:
'I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart'
The small details of our lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, the property, the bank balance that matters. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!
If you don't share this, nothing will happen to you, but if you do, you just might save a marriage.
Relationships are made not to exploit, not to be broken.
We teach some by what we say
We teach some more by what we do
But we teach most by what we are
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You don't get to choose how you are going to die, or when, but, you can decide how you are going to live, here and now.hi,
I came to US 5 years back in H4. My husband processed GC and 140 is cleared and 485 pending. I got my EAD and now working. My husband and I have problems and he is threatening to ruin my life.
Can I know a few things
1. Can he take me out of the GC ?
2. Can he revoke my EAD ?
3. Can my employee extend my EAD which is expiring in 2010 and continue my GC.
please help...
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